Divorce can be an intense passageway, one that is best managed with as much support and assistance as possible. If you are interested in a specific Tarot spread to look at some aspects of your personal journey through divorce, I have one here. Looking back at that post, that was not only a great spread to get a full reading on the whole process, but damn I pulled some sweet cards to lead me through! I love the serendipity of Tarot. Pulling cards at random is great. Using spreads is great. But some cards offer wisdom and we can seek them out to deepen understanding of what we may be going through. There are a few cards that are great for the divorce journey, and for me, The Tower is the best. The Tower, card number 16 in the Major Arcana is all about dismantling old structures that are not working any more. It represents purification through destruction.
This symbol is much easier to accept if you are the petitioner – or the person choosing the divorce. Or, even more so, if you are being denied a fair divorce and are fighting for your freedom. There are days I would like to wear this card. I want this card printed on t-shirts and underwear! If you are the one wishing it were not so, then you’ve got the 3rd degree burns and the destruction and you may not be able to really accept the beauty of this element of transformation. That’s cool. Your journey is very real and very challenging.
This card is brutal. It says, your masks, your false sense of security, the shallow parts of your identity need to be detonated. Now. You don’t get any more time.
Break-up is a great way to describe the end of a relationship. Breakable things get broken. Things get thrown or smashed or spent on lawyers or strewn about town, but at times it feels like there is no way to avoid the trashing of a fair amount of stuff. It’s a tough scene.
But wait. What were we thinking when we built all those pretty towers? We wanted structure. We wanted protection. We wanted to do the right thing and build our lives up. Oops. Something at the center could not hold. It was on shaky ground. It was never solid because it was built on illusions. And now the time is up.
Of course you think you’re not ready. No one ever is. But the Tower card says “Put on your HASMAT gear and watch this shit crumble and burn.” Party is over. There is no growth without destruction. And lets find the joy and power in the explosion!
The Tower shows anger and fear and all the emotions that need to be expressed in order to move to the next level.
I love this card from the Thoth deck that really expresses the primal and visceral anger that is necessary in a good purification experience. Those things we have built need to burn and crumble and fall to the ground. It needs to be chaotic. It should be scary. Without the experience of this kind of intensity, there will not be forward movement. There will be stuckness. Pretending everything is cool, just so people don’t get freaked out. will only result in a bigger explosion…later. The more repressed our emotions are, the bigger the explosion when it all gets uncovered.
The Tower shows destruction – to make room for reconstruction. It is important to use our breakdowns as pathways to greater awareness and increased consciousness. Don’t waste the energy of this rage – channel it into making the next phase of your life into something wonderful!
*** IMPORTANT NOTE! – this mystical-ish rant in no way endorses the use of violence. It can be therapeutic to consciously express anger in a safe way, but lashing out at people is wrong. Don’t you dare go hurt someone and blame me!